Buckham Alley Theatre Plant Security Auditions

Genre: Comedy

Logline: When a loyal, wisecracking security team at a 1980s Midwestern auto plant learns their jobs may be outsourced to a cheaper outside firm, they have until year’s end to prove their irreplaceable value — one stolen chain, one phantom defecator, andone very drunk Hungarian at a time.

Cast size:
13 Total – 5 WOMEN, 8 MEN

Primary Players:

CAPTAIN ED MUSIELEWICZ (pronounced MUSE-a-lev-itch) (50s) is the unflappable Navy bred Captain of the Plant Security team. A man whose authority derives entirely from character rather than rank, who is street-smart and cares about his work and crew.

BILL BARNES (40s) is the colorful and loyal sergeant from Kentucky with unvarnished realism.

KATHY CLARK (30s) is a single mother, a loyal hard working security guard, with a sense of humor.

CHRIS HANKS (20s) is an effective point-of-view character for the audience — a young, curious, and still learning security guard.

STEVE BLAKELY (20-30s) is the play’s antagonist. He’s a rising star with big ideas, good hair, an Ohio State MBA, and more than a touch of arrogance.

MR. KOWALSKI (40-50s) is the ambitious manager over plant security, and hopes that Steve is his ticket to executive row.

Supporting Players:
(Ages 20s to 60s) These actors have speaking roles as secondary characters in one to two scenes, and may play more than one character. Through costume changes they will also be needed as background performers posing as employees – coming and going through the employee entrance and working in the plant area.

JAKAB and MAGYAR ORS (30-50s) Jakab is a lamb of a worker until he drinks, and Magyar (aka: The Hungarian Battleaxe) with her curlers and babushka, fears no one.

HAROLD COOPER – (50s) an executive and former fellow altar boy of Captain Ed. He hires Steve Blakely to investigate outsourcing the security services.

THE VISITOR – a nicely dressed business woman who is mistaken to be a government inspector

MERYL MADISON – a dimwitted worker who gets trapped inside a wall

AILING MAN – a large worker who appears to be having a heart attack in a small space

Supporting Players with a few lines or as a featured background performer. They will also portray multiple employees.
Note: These are great starter roles for new actors!

WORKER NO. 2 – A fast food coupon king
WORKER NO. 3 – Coupon accomplice to Worker No. 2
CHAIN-MAN – An employee with more than a back problem
CHAIN-MAN ACCOMPLICE – employee
TODD – A Blakely spy who gets lost in the plant
BINKERSON GUARD – escort for The Visitor
BREADMAN – A vendor who leaves more than bread during deliveries
LARRY KRUTZ and PAUL O’BRIEN (30s – 60s) – two drunk pals at Christmas party
VENDOR NO. 1 – A green grocer deliveryman
HERCZOG – A worker who sneaks in his accordion or concertina with his troublesome monkey to a Christmas party (no lines). (Having your own accordion and being able to play polkas, is a plus!)
WORKER NO. 1 – reports a fire to Plant Security
PARTYGOER NO. 1 – lookout for Herczog
WOMEN NO. 1 – lookout for Herczog